This can't be a real thing...

For the most part I am pretty good about not falling into the trappings of infomercials. I'll occasionally get sucked into a product (the Amazing Pasta Pot remains one of my better purchases), but I often have the willpower to change the channel before I hear what the once-in-a-lifetime low, low price is going to be. I wish I could say that went for all of my family, because for a time we had not one, but two magical Workout Beans in the house.

But last night I caught what was either the tale end of a commercial or infomercial, I'm not sure which, for a product I simply had to investigate further today. That product is the JumpSnap. The JumpSnap is essentially weighted short ropes that give you all the benefits of jumping rope without the pesky rope. Now you don't have to worry about finding enough clearance or tangles in the rope (as if tangles with rope that thick are really that hard). I love that infomercials can invent problems you never knew you had, just so that they can solve them with a product you never knew you needed. And, here's the best part, it's only $60 (plus shipping and handling, of course). Are you kidding me? You can get a professional jump rope for $12-$15. If that's too high tech for you, how much does a solid piece of rope cost, about $2 a foot?

Now, you probably wouldn't guess it to look at me, given the size 14 feet and 4 inch vertical, but I was a solid jump roper back in the day. How else would you explain my trainer-approved "awesome calves"? Coach MacGuire used to make us do all sort of weird training techniques for shot put and at one point I was well over 100 jumps in a minute. So, this jump rope without the rope offends me. Where is the skill of jumping rope when there is no rope? It's just jumping (Addison, by the way, already a pro at this). If you don't have to worry about landing on the rope then you may as well not even bother with moving your hands around. Then it's just you bouncing up and down for 20 minutes and you look like an idiot.

Also, I hate that we've taken a kid's toy and made it into work as adults. No wonder growing up sucks so much. "Hey, remember how much fun you used to have with this? Now I'm going to make you do it for an hour, no matter how much you complain. Start sweating! Oh and you don't even get a rope. Just the jump part!" What's next, SeekPro, which will be Hide and Seek without the part where your friend is hiding? You just spend an hour looking around your house, never finding anyone. "You'll burn calories while you look and as an added bonus you'll get to see all the areas of your house that you need to go back to later and clean. Isn't being an adult fun?"