Madeline's First Birthday!

Today is my niece Madeline's first birthday.
The year has gone by really fast.
Let's take a look back, shall we?

Here she is just a couple hours after arrival.
Please note the bow on the hat....

...because she obviously likes her accessories.
And no, there is no make-up on her, her cheeks are just that rosy.

She might be rocking the Patriots gear now,
but she's my Goddaughter so expect the Celtics conversion soon.

Happy Birthday, Madeline!

Love You.

-Uncle Tommy

I'm Not Going To Lie To You...

...I'm phoning it in today. Truth be told I just spent several hours walking around a hilly golf course on a day where temperatures are hovering between 94 and 99 degrees with humidity somewhere between 80 and 1000 percent. I had a blast and I'll be sharing pictures shortly, but for now I just want to stick my entire body in ice and lower my core temperature.

So, while I'm doing that, let's enjoy some humor about Girl Scout cookies.

That Worked Out Well For You

Yesterday Washington Post writer Mike Wise decided to conduct his own little social experiment. He made up a news item stating he had learned Ben Roethlisberger's 6-game suspension was only going to be reduced down to five games. Since most people expect Roethlisberger to end up missing just four games, this would constitute fairly interesting sports news. Wise sent out this piece of made-up information on his Twitter feed, saying later the point of the entire thing was to see how long it would take for blogs everywhere to take the ball and run with it, accepting the rumor as truth without doing any work of their own, and also seeing how many would fail to give proper credit back to where they first heard the 'news'. Apparently, this was supposed to prove just how unreliable the Internet is. The problem for Wise is that his timing sucks. While it was probably true that five or six years ago people believed everything online, we have come a long way since then. People now have started to go the exact opposite way, demanding more proof than ever before they will believe something found on a website (unless of course it's on Wikipedia, because that site is never wrong), and as a result the rumor went pretty much nowhere. Also, while this was an interesting and original idea in 2002, in 2010 newspaper journalists are no longer in a position where they can afford to be seen as getting stories wrong. Being seen that way will only serve to drive more readers to sites like ESPN. But, apparently Wise figured people thinking he was incompetent at his job was a small price to pay to show the world that sometimes people on the Internet make shit up. He was promptly suspended by the Post for a month.

Letting the unoriginality of the idea slide, I have other issues with how Wise conducted this little experiment. I feel like he went wrong in two ways. First, this experiment doesn't work for Twitter. The stereotype of news being randomly made up by someone pretty much only applies to blogs. Every corporation has a Twitter feed in today's world, people tend to follow only select accounts of people who they either know or trust and you have to go looking specifically for those accounts. Twitter isn't like a fan chat forum where a random individual can throw something they heard from their brother, who heard it from some guy he knows, out there as gospel truth for everyone who belongs to the forum to see, all the while hiding behind some handle like JoePat6969. The days of random people stumbling onto random pages are long gone. Secondly, you can't work from a position of establishment if you're trying to spread lies - it screws up the entire point of the experiment. Wise works for a huge newspaper and has a proven track record of breaking stories (at least, until yesterday). When you have credibility either built up over time or because of the company you work for, obviously people are more likely to take what you say as truth without questioning. If he really wanted to see how a rumor could spread online what he should have done is create a fake Twitter account and email under a false name, then sent a Tweet saying he had heard the rumor about Roethlisberger's suspension to a few specific blogs and added he had heard it from a cousin or some other relative who works at the league office. Then he could have seen if those specific blogs would have written back to him for confirmation or just accepted it as truth and the experiment would have had a much more controlled sample size. The good news for him is that he has a month to work out the kinks before he tries again.

-I've decided that displaying sneakers on a table at waist-level is the worst way to do so. This is because you should see sneakers from some height, otherwise they look bigger than they are. And yes, this revelation came from me seeing out a pair of sneakers on a table, thinking that they looked massive, but then discovering that they were actually two sizes smaller than the pontoons I need for my feet.

-The Celtics re-signed Delonte West today. This makes me very happy because I bought a Delonte West #13 jersey about five days before he was traded and therefore only got to wear it once and that wasn't even to a game. It is very rare that a jersey is ever brought back into the rotation. So, as long as he isn't assigned a new number (which given my luck could very well happen) this will work out very well for me.

He's Your Problem Now

Whenever a relationship ends, there is a period of regret and reflection. Human nature when thinking about the past is to gloss over the bad times and focus solely on the good - forgetting for the moment that the person was and continues to be bat-shit crazy. This kind of reflection only serves to make the regret stronger. Because you're thinking about only the good times, thoughts start to creep in that perhaps you were too quick to end the relationship and could have done more to try and save it. That regret deepens further if you can't seem to find anyone to take their place, but discover that your ex is now in a stable and happy new relationship. Suddenly you can't figure out why they weren't this way with you and what makes this new person so much better? The good news is that crazy can only be kept hidden for so long. A time will come when you will find that they have begun to act just as insane in their new relationship. Then you can relax, regain your confidence because you made the right decision and feel sorry for the poor idiot who fell for their act just like you did. I'm talking, of course, about Red Sox fans and their relationship with Manny Ramirez.

Red Sox fans have always had a complex relationship with Ramirez, which continues even though his time in Boston ended badly and he's been gone for two full seasons. There are still those in Red Sox Nation who wish the Sox had never let Manny go, because we have never been able to replace his power in the line-up and when Manny left a lot of what was interesting about the Red Sox on a day-to-day basis went with him. The team is more professional, but professional is boring, they'll say. (Sadly, I agree on this point. The 2010 Red Sox are like watching paint dry.) They even wanted the Red Sox to claim him off of waivers from the Dodgers if he fell to us. They had forgotten all about the abusing of clubhouse staff, the not running out of ground balls, the iffy (at best) defense and the refusing to be put in the lineup even though there was an injury because he had been promised the day off. "He could provide the spark that could get us back in the division race," I would hear them say on sports talk radio, forgetting that he could also be the spark that blows the Sox clubhouse apart. Fortunately, Manny reminded them all over the weekend why he was let go in the first place when Ramirez managed to end his run in Los Angeles in a spectacularly dickheaded fashion.

For those of you who didn't see it, let me set the scene: LA is in Colorado playing the Rockies. The bases are loaded for the Dodgers, who are clinging to slimming playoff hopes. A win would go a long way. Manny, who hasn't played since being placed on waivers a couple of days prior and is rumored to be on his way to the White Sox, is called upon to be a pinch-hitter. Manny has never been the kind of player to strain himself for the good of the team even if fully invested and with Chicago putting a waiver claim on him he's contractually halfway out the door, which means mentally he's already gone. Nevermind the millions of dollars they paid him or how they stood by him when he failed a steroid tests - he simply doesn't want to be a Dodger anymore and in his mind that is all that matters. The first pitch is about a full foot outside, but called a strike. Now, it was a bad call, but not the worst call of the season, the month or even the week. Manny immediately starts jawing at the umpire. Much like when a manager has to work to get ejected, Ramirez will not let it go in a thinly-veiled desire to get tossed. Mercifully, Manny is finally tossed after seeing just one pitch in his pinch-hit appearance and just like that his Dodger career is over. No one in the Dodgers dugout seems too surprised or upset about the turn of events. They almost seem relieved. Like I said, crazy always manages to resurface. Suddenly no one was sad the Sox didn't make a move to bring Manny back.

So today when Manny was introduced in Chicago I had to laugh as everyone on SportsCenter was gushing over the possibilities that Manny could be a great addition to an already powerful line-up and that this could be the move that powers the White Sox to a division title. Yeah, that could happen because there is only a month left in the season and the White Sox are competitive. A motivated Manny Ramirez is still a hell of a ballplayer. But, Manny is also in a contract year and not one to let a little thing like a division race push that out of his mind. Let Ramirez hit five homeruns in a week and then ask the club about a contract extension beyond this season. Let's see how invested he is if they don't jump at the chance to pay him $20 million a season. Or, let's see what happens if Manny isn't the spark and the White Sox are five games out with a week left in the season. The White Sox should remember that there is a reason Ramirez was passed over by the entire National League and most of the American League without being claimed. So, if this is the spark that gets them going, good for you, Chicago, you took a risk and it paid off. But, if at the end of the season Manny is leaving the ballpark before the last game even ends and yet no one is sad to see him leave, you can't say we didn't warn you.

The Emmys For Shows I've Seen

Every year the Emmy's bring a stunning fact to light: I don't watch a lot of quality TV. Now, I watch as much TV as the next guy, but year after year the Emmys reward shows that I simply haven't seen or don't like enough to watch more than once. Apparently, my tastes are just not outstanding enough. [Sidebar: When did we stop awarding 'best' in favor of 'outstanding'? Did the Emmys get taken over by the Little League Moms of America?] You would think that this would inspire me to broaden my viewing horizons to include better shows, but I'd be fooling myself if I said I was going to do that. I'm going to keep on just watching the shows I already do. Instead, I'm going the other way and simply handing out my own Emmys, which will only be picked from the shows I do watch. As I only seem to watch 8 shows, expect to see a lot of repeats.

Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Drama Series
Winner: Maggie Siff, "Sons of Anarchy"

Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Drama Series
Winner: Adam Ferrara, "Rescue Me"
Alright, I admit, I haven't watched "Rescue Me" in a couple of seasons, I just like Ferarra's stand-up routine. I assume this is how most Emmy voters do their jobs as well.

Outstanding Lead Actress in a Drama Series
Winner: Katey Sagal, "Sons of Anarchy".

Outstanding Lead Actor in a Drama Series
Winner: Timothy Olyphant, "Justified."

Outstanding Drama Series
Winner: "Sons of Anarchy"
I've always thought the best dramas are the ones that leave you feeling like your guts have been slightly twisted. This series does just that.

Outstanding Reality Competition Program
Winner: "Big Break, Sandals Resort"
It had the added advantage of being the only reality competition program that I have every watched.

Outstanding Variety, Music or Comedy Series
Winner: “The Daily Show with Jon Stewart”
Hey, look, the Emmys and I agreed on one!

Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series
Winner: Sasha Alexander, "Rizzoli & Isles"
What do you mean that show isn't supposed to be a comedy?

Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Comedy Series
Winner: Neil Patrick Harris, "How I Met Your Mother"
Sadly, he's quickly become the only reason to watch this show.

Outstanding Lead Actress in a Comedy Series
Winners: Julia Louis-Dreyfus, "Seinfeld"
Isn't it standard Emmy protocol every year to give a statue to someone from a show that's already been cancelled? Besides, I see more episodes of "Seinfeld" on TV than almost any other show, so it's like it never left. I guarantee the reruns get more viewers than her new show.

Outstanding Lead Actor in a Comedy Series
Winner: Jim Parsons, “The Big Bang Theory”
Wow, the Emmys and I agreed on two. Higher than I thought it would be.

Outstanding Comedy Series
Winner: "Family Guy"
I know it's a cartoon. I also know isn't as critically-acclaimed as shows like "30 Rock" or "The Office", but frankly, that's a good thing. Every now and again it's nice to have some low-brow comedy. I'm tired of being made to feel guilty just because I don't watch "30 Rock" religiously. I laugh when this show is on and that's pretty much the only criteria that should matter.

What's In A Name?

Yesterday I was driving down the highway and passed a strip mall. On the directory outside the mall there was a sign for a store called Computer Store. Not even The Computer Store, just Computer Store. Zooming passed at 50 mph, I was struck by two thoughts in about five seconds: First, the founders of this store appeared to have spent literally zero minutes coming up with a name. They couldn't even be bothered to think about it and banter a couple of possibilities around - if they had I doubt Computer Store would have been the winner. Seriously, it appears they got everyone who was investing into a room and one person said, "We want to open a store that sells computers. We will call it Computer Store... (45 seconds of silence). Good meeting, everybody." The second thing to hit me was that I have no doubt that if I had a computer issue, I am bringing my PC to Computer Store. Think about it: when you are that unoriginal it must be because you are supremely confident in your abilities. You only have a name that simple if you have no doubts you will be remembered and recommended by customers. You can't be bland and terrible at your job. But, who needs a catchy title like Geek Squad if you can instead be remembered as the guys who fix every problem without a hiccup? No need to think of a marketing plan; just let the work speak for itself.

Further down the road I saw the exact opposite side of the coin, as there was a large billboard for a local attorney, Scott B. Brilliant. Now, I'm not saying that I think this was a made-up name cobbled together by some marketing team, but I do think that this guy has been thinking about what kind of business he was going to be opening since he was about 10. You don't have the last name Brilliant and end up working somewhere your name isn't going to be seen. You just know that as Scott was growing up he had a plethora of fake business cards ready to go for whatever industry he would end up going into: Brilliant Auto Repair, Brilliant Carpet and Window Cleaners, etc. Therefore, I do not think the design meetings for this billboard were quick. Brilliant appears to have put a lot of thought into how he would present himself to potential clients, as evidenced by the use of the middle initial that is also conveniently a verb. Also, I bet he got a lot of traction from those Guinness ads a few years back. (However, I feel like he earned that right because you know every time he got less than an A on a test in school he heard about it from his friends and teachers.) A quick look at his website shows he does Civil Litigation and Insurance Disputes. I just wonder if he helped draw up the insurance coverage plan for Computer Store.

Radio Contest Ramblings

So, all this week I tried and tried to win a radio call-in contest on the local classic rock station (remind me another time to write about how we as a society need to get together and define the word "classic") by being the 25th caller. It was an exercise in extreme frustration. This was not the first time I tried to win tickets to this event. Two months ago I was part of a contest on Twitter in which 3 of the 11 people who entered won tickets (roughly 27%, which should be great odds). I was not one of the three. Later, I signed up for a Facebook account specifically to win tickets to this same event and I was one of only 12 people who got all the questions right. I still didn't win. Why I thought I would have a better chance in an open contest against hundreds of thousands of listeners is beyond my comprehension. [Editor's Note: It should be pointed out that the event I was attempting to win tickets for was not sold out. In fact, it still isn't. I could have, at any time in this little experiment, gone online, bought tickets and put myself out of my misery. But, it was the principle behind the whole thing.] Anyway, here are some thoughts I collected along the way:

-The very first time I tried to win the tickets I not only got through, but I was caller number 8. I feel like I got through too easily and this gave me a sense of false confidence. Since the last two times I tried to win I was against a low number of people, I assumed these tickets were not a high-demand item. I forgot a key thing I had learned when I worked in radio: people want anything that is free, they don't care what it is.

-The person who designed the phone system where it rings once or twice before changing to a busy signal needs to be kicked in the face. Same goes for whoever thought it would be a good idea to have a three second silent pause before the busy signal kicks in. Like I need to be teased like that.

-Still, the "rings, then goes to busy signal" is an upgrade to the phone call where it just rings and rings and rings and no one ever picks up, which happened to me three times. I can only assume when this happens it is because the DJ is busy collecting the winner's contact information and I'm caller number 26, but still, let me know for sure. To allow me to hang like that is just cruel.

-I had a shockingly low success rate for even getting through to the station. I tried calling 31 times and only got through on four attempts. Those four times I was caller number 8, 4, 14 and, worst of all, 24. Frankly, I think I would rather never get through than be that close and not win.

-You wouldn't believe how mad you get when you hear the DJ talk to the person who did win, because they never sound excited enough for your tastes. You just find yourself talking to the radio, "You don't deserve to win, Michael from Sudbury!"

-Still, at least Mike from Sudbury was kind of excited. One time the guy who called in had no idea what he won, where he was going or when the tickets were for. Apparently he just called for the hell of it and wound up winning. I officially hate that guy.

Now, I wish I could wrap this up with the fairytale ending that I won tickets on the final chance, but I didn't. I never even got through on the last day. This is why I don't buy scratch tickets.