The Art of Polite Responses

I really feel like a lot of the problems of the world could be avoided if we could all just agree, on occasion, to shut the hell up. Life is hard enough as it is, you don't need other people coming in and raining on your personal parade. Yet no one wants to be the bigger person anymore and everyone feels the need to get the last word in. The act of politely smiling and nodding despite what you may be thinking (followed by commenting about the person once they are out of earshot) has become a lost science. In this regard I feel like my parents have done an exceptional job of raising my siblings and I. We may think you are an asshole of the highest regard, but you'll most likely never know it because we grew up learning the techniques of the polite response. (When everyone you encounter feels the need to tell you their entire life story it comes in very handy.) We just let you go on starring in your own play, unaware that you're the asshole.

Sure, we've all felt the need to turn to people while they are talking and tell them how much of an idiot they are. But that just creates the need for them to defend their position and usually cements how much of an idiot they are. So now you know for sure that person is an idiot, but you already knew that; the only things you've done now are lost moments of your life that you can never recover and possibly ruined that person's day because now they have to confront the fact that they are an idiot. The quicker action is to smile, nod, think "what a fucking idiot", and get on with your life. That would be the polite response.

This story is a tougher call, though. I don't think anyone should be blurting out their beliefs at work unless someone specifically asks (and even then you should change the subject, cause those conversations never lead anywhere good). But on the other hand, I have a severe dislike for people who troll for compliments. People who tell the office weeks in advance they have a birthday coming are annoying to no end. And, this woman mentioning four times that she was getting married sounds like she was fishing for approval. I don't need to hear about any co-worker's wedding that much. Still, if he just knew how to give the polite response he may still have a job. Also, if you have such a problem with gay marriage perhaps you shouldn't move to a state where it is legal.