I Should Be Fine, Right?

-Have you ever gotten a parking spot that is so good, you almost don't believe that it's legal? This afternoon I went to go see the new movie, The Town (full review coming tomorrow) and when I pulled up onto the second floor of the parking garage and there, wide-open, was the very first spot next to the walkway which leads directly across and into the theatres. You know, the one next to the handicap spots. This was quite literally the closest I could legally park in relation to my destination. However, I had a momentary pause because I never quite know what to think when that spot is open. In the back of my mind I assume that it's just another handicap spot that someone has unfortunately mis-marked. I would hate to come out of an enjoyable film only to discover my car either ticketed or towed, because it would ruin the entire movie experience for me. Also, my legs are working just fine and therefore I really don't need to park that close. I'm sure there is someone just on the cusp of needing a handicapped spot that would make much better use of it then me. I usually have this nagging feeling of guilt that tells me I should find another spot, just slightly farther away. Of course, this feeling goes away after .01 seconds and I pull right in. After all, who am I to argue with the parking gods?

-So, here's one from the "I Told You So" files: during Dallas Cowboys' Training Camp, rookie wide receiver Dez Bryant caused a mini-stir by refusing to take place in the time-honored hazing tradition of carrying a veteran's pads after practice. Bryant refused to carry Roy Williams' pads, contending he was here to play football and not be a pack mule. Now, at the time I advised Bryant to just carry the pads and move on with his life. As hazing went he was getting off pretty light. However, Bryant escaped training camp without any more serious hazing and appeared to have won this stand-off. But then earlier this week Roy Williams decided the rookie should take a few teammates out to dinner at a Dallas steak house. At first it was just supposed to be the offense, but Williams invited a few more teammates, then a few more, until the entire team was going. And, due to his earlier refusal to play along with rookie hazing, the Cowboys decided to eat well on Bryant's dime. Essentially the entire menu was ordered, along with several bottles of wine. Apparently many were ordered and then not even opened, but instead taken home at twice the price. At the end of the night the bill ended up being just short of $55,000 (without tip). Now Bryant was a high first-round draft pick, so he can definitely afford it. You just have to wonder if he has re- thought his stance that he is too good to be hazed and whether it was worth it.

-Yesterday it was announced that Tour de France winner Alberto Contador failed a drug test during his Tour-winning ride earlier this year. While that in and of itself is not news, because most of these riders fail a test at some point in their careers, what I always enjoy after an athlete fails a drug test is the attempt to come up with an excuse. In Contador's case, he claimed that he ate some contaminated meat. You know, because meat is often contaminated with muscle-building medication that improves lung function, which sure would come in handy if you were, oh, I don't know, pedalling through the mountains for weeks at a time. This comes on the heels of several other athletes failing because they also ate beef that was given illegal drugs. Seriously, why is it that if you or I ate some contaminated beef it would never be with positive results (we would be lying in a hospital somewhere puking up everything we've ever eaten in the past decade), but these athletes only ever seem to eat food that has been contaminated with drugs that are performance-enhancing? What a coincidence. If I was in charge of security for the race what I would do is start guarding the food trucks closer, because clearly that is where the big lapse in security is.