Another Week's Worth Of Mini-Ramblings

-Could someone tell me when tissues became useless in the fight for clean glasses? As I was watering my lawn this afternoon I got some spray on my lenses. Using my shirt to wipe the water away only made it worse, but grabbing a Kleenex to try and clean them didn't make it much better. It just seemed to smudge the water, causing my eyesight to become even blurrier. The only thing that finally got my glasses clean again was using one of those special micro-fiber clothes that you often see in optical stores. Seriously, what kind of racket have the people who make glasses and the people who make micro-fiber clothes cooked up here?

-Earlier this week there was a story about a kid who watched the movie The Program and then re-enacted the infamous scene where a couple of players laid down in the middle of the road to show how tough/hardcore they were. Only in real life, a car came along and killed the kid. Now, this happened several times when the movie first came out in 1993, so I am going to ignore all the obvious comments about this guy because those jokes were all made the first time around. Instead, I have a different question: where did this kid find a copy of the movie with that part included? The scene was quickly edited out while the film was still in theatres and wasn't even included on the DVD, which I found annoying because that was half the reason I even bought the thing (the other half being that The Program is one of the more under-rated sports movies of the past 20 years). I must have seen that movie a dozen times and still have never seen this scene. This kid was clearly smart enough to know his way around the Internet, so you would think he would know enough not to lie in the middle of the road.

-There was a big to-do in the entertainment industry this week when Steve Carrell announced that he's going to be leaving The Office. People are trying to figure out if this will kill the show or just force it to reinvent itself. I lean more towards kill, but not right away. They could probably get another season out of it, just to see how it goes, but remember how awful that last season of That 70's Show was without Topher Grace? If they still had the Pam and Jim saga to play out it would have been better, but at this point I think that's all done. It was never as good as the British version anyway.

-You know what I am not looking forward to tomorrow? Highlights of the yearly Coney Island hotdog eating contest. First off, shoving a lot of food down your throat really fast is not a sport, it's just an easting disorder. Secondly, how did this become synonymous with the 4th of July? Really, that day is supposed to be about fireworks and barbecues but I can't eat a hotdog after watching that. We need to stop glorifying this event, just like we need to end this strange obsession with people using New Year's Eve as an excuse to jump cars and bikes over and off of things that no one asked them to.

-While I normally am not one for cologne, I like to spray a little on for interviews. However, the other day I had one, but a quick look revealed that I could not get another spray out of the bottle that I had. Thus, I was forced to go to the emergency stash of sample-sized ones that I get each year from my Christmas stocking. Just because it was the most recent and therefore the least likely to have separated back to it's flammable components, I went with the Axe body spray. I'm never going to claim to have any type of odor-sensing skills, but the smell was very familiar to me. Turns out that Axe Body spray is the same as Drakkar Noir, just with a different label. I guess no matter what year you were born, that scent will be your first cologne, whether you want it to be or not.