Twitter Catch-Up

I was down at the family beach house for a couple of days and thus wasn't able to keep up with my Twitter account. Hope I didn't miss anything. Anyway, here are some thoughts I collected while I was without Internet access:

-I was watching the news one night when they did a story about a sailboat hitting a barge. During the story I heard what could possibly be the most useless quote in the history of television. A woman who was a 'witness' to the crash said the following: "I thought the sailboat had the right of way due to the direction it was coming, but maybe the barge had the right of way because it was the bigger boat. I don't know who hit who, though, so I'm not really sure what happened." Oh, thank you, you've been very helpful.

-That story followed a report about a duckboat being hit by barge in Philadelphia (apparently barges are hard to get around). Just a couple days prior there was a news story about a whale-watching ferry running aground and nearly sinking off of Hingham. Who knew that boating accidents were like celebrity deaths - apparently they come in threes.

-The news proved to be very interesting that night, because next came a story about a mental patient who escaped early one afternoon from the guards who were supposed to be watching him and attempted to carjack a woman the next town over the following morning. The reporter mentioned that the victim was just in the wrong place at the wrong time and was pulling into the parking lot at that moment because she wanted to get to work early that morning. Now, the woman is ok, so I feel like I'm not out of line to mention that she will probably never be early to work ever again, and no one is going to call her out on it.

-One of my go-to movie stations is HBO Comedy, because most of the time they either have a good movie or a stand-up special on. But, the other night when I flipped passed it was showing The Fifth Element. I'm pretty sure when they were making that movie this channel was not their desired ending spot. Apparently, now they've begun showing movie that have unintentional comedy as well. It's only a matter of time before they are showing Honey.

-While walking on the beach I saw two young parents screaming at each other over their not-as-young-as-he-probably-should-be child. They were causing quite the ruckas and thus a lot of people were staring. The main thing they were screaming about? How embarrassed they were that their kid was misbehaving and causing a scene. With all due respect to Ms. Alanis Morissette, I think that has to be the new definition of irony.