Not Adding Up

There is an old joke which has been passed around from comedian to comedian and while the exact wording can change the premise has to do with how weird it is that hot dogs comes in packs of 8 while hot dog rolls are usually packs of 10. (You don't hear it much lately because some hot dog companies smartened up and started putting out 10 packs. The modern equivalent would be something along the lines of how strange it is that text messages can be 160 characters and Tweets, which you can text in, can only be 140 characters. You're welcome, joke thieves.) The point is that companies have been giving customers odd numbers of items since the beginning of time. I was thinking about this toward the end of the summer when I was staying down the beach and wanted to buy just enough food to last me through the weekend since it was the end of the season and anything I didn't eat was just going to be brought home. I planned to grill that evening but since I was by myself I only needed two hamburgers and two rolls. While buying only two hamburger patties was extremely easy to accomplish, the smallest pack of hamburger rolls was 8. That was way too much extra bread. I simply couldn't believe my only options were 8 or nothing. But, I have started to notice the grocery store is not the only place this kind of thing is happening.

This evening is the Celtics' home opener. This happens to be one of my favorite days of the year because I love the Celtics as well as pomp and circumstance and opening night combines the two. That is why I like to record the game for posterity. I have tons of old Celtics games on tape and a couple of years ago I started to record straight to DVD to save shelf space. However, because it is pretty much the only thing I bother to record straight to DVD all year long I tend to forget about it until the last minute. That is why yesterday afternoon I found myself heading out to the local record store hoping to buy a blank DVD for the game. Unfortunately that store did not have any blank DVDs, leading me on a scavenger hunt to several more stores in the area before I finally found some. But even when I found them I was hesitant to pull the trigger on buying them because the smallest pack I could find had 15 blank DVDs in it. That seems to be an excessive number. I always assumed I could find a smaller pack at the next store, but never did. I'm sure that shipping out single packages of blank DVDs wouldn't be cost effective, but I don't feel I'm crazy to think there should be middle step, like a five-pack. Considering industry experts think DVDs are a dying technology, there is no guarantee I'd even be able to use all 15 before the next big thing comes along. It felt too much like a scam.

However, that was nothing when compared to what I saw when I thought about admitting defeat and just recording the game on VHS for the time being with plans of converting it later. Now, you may think I was going to have trouble finding a place which sold blank VHS tapes, but that was actually the easy part. They were in the first store I stopped in. What surprised me was that the smallest pack of blank tapes I could buy contained 6 tapes. In this day and age, who needs 6 blank VHS tapes? I pretty sure the package I looked at has been sitting there since the store opened. Even more amazing was that on the shelf next to it were the blank cassette tapes, the smallest of which came in a pack of two. You can buy blank CDs for the same price, so shouldn't not having to buy more than you need be something the cassette makers should be trying? When you have an inferior product, I'm not sure you should be playing hardball. I assume these companies are just desperate to offload the remainder of their inventory but trying to do so while acting like they are giving their customers a deal feels rather disingenuous. It would be like someone trying to haggle you up at a yard sale, when you know damn well that if no one buys this stuff by the end of the day it will be in the trash by tomorrow.

I know it seems weird to be complaining about getting more for my money, but this goes back to the common theme of being given a lot of something no one really needs. At some point it becomes an issue of space, because getting a great price on something you are never going to use makes you question just how good a deal it really is. I really think these companies would be able to move a larger amount of certain products if they sold them in single-packs. As long as the keep the price down people are a lot less likely to notice the difference. For example, I found single blank DVDs online for $3 (obviously it would have been more with shipping, but mostly it just confirmed my belief that single DVDs are for sale somewhere). The 15 pack would have cost $25. Now, if you work out the math that 15 pack is obviously a much better deal. However, will it still feel like a great a deal a couple years from now when 22 of those DVDs are sitting on my desk collecting dust? This is the same question I always ask myself when I am at warehouse stores like BJs - is spending more to get a bundle really worth it when I only need one of something? I think it comes down to asking yourself if you can even think of a way to use up the extra. I mean, I would love to be recording the NBA Finals in a couple months, but even then I would have way more extra DVDs than I need. Luckily I found a random blank DVD floating around because I feel like buying products you aren't sure you will ever have a need for is how hoarding starts. Still, at least that would get me on TV and give me something else to record with all the blank DVDs I would have left over.