Should Have Left It Alone

I have discovered that there are two kinds of people in this world - people who have no problem watching the same movie multiple times and people who think this activity is a giant waste of time. The multiple viewers figure that watching the movie was fun the first time around, so it stands to reason it will still be somewhat enjoyable the second time, whereas the people who only want to watch a movie once think there is nothing to be gained from watching anything where you already know the ending. As the owner of several hundred DVDs, I think it is pretty obvious which camp I fall into, though I can see where the 'once is enough' crowd is coming from. (My bookcase is equally crowded and certainly have never felt the need to read them more than once.) What is kind of fascinating is how there is absolutely no budging someone from one camp to the other, as if it is ingrained into our very DNA. I don't know which faction is larger but in the last couple of years movie studios have clearly started to recognize that there are plenty of people willing to watch a movie the second time around, which is when they started to re-release previous hits back into the theaters in an attempt to rope in an entirely new audience. It happened just this week as "Jurassic Park" found itself back in theaters on Friday.

Now, I loved "Jurassic Park" when I first saw it. Previously I've talked about my theory that every kid goes through a dinosaur phase which they never truly grow out of - it may get pushed back by things they love more as adults, but that interest in dinosaurs is always in there somewhere. When the movie came out in 1993 I was just a few years removed from my dinosaur obsession and so I was very keen to see it, but I was far from alone. At the time the special effects were mind-blowing, the monsters were scary without being too scary (Actual puppets, kids. This CGI stuff was very expensive back then) and the script was so well done it appealed to people of every age, which is why it has made $900 million through the years. With that kind of loyal fanbase just getting to the age when they could take the next generation to see this movie I can understand why the studio thinks they can squeeze just a few more dollars out of it. Also, there is no denying that some movies are just better when you see them on a big screen with surround sound. With all that in mind you would expect me to be on the side of the people who are putting the movie back out there for people to enjoy. I'm not.

The reason I don't want this movie back in theaters could be summed up in 2 characters: 3D. Yes, it is not enough to just bring the movie back because it is great, they had to mess with it by adding elements of 3D. I can not stand 3D movies. Seriously, didn't we vote on 3D back in the 80s and decide as a country that we didn't like it? Trust me, no one has ever been watching a great movie and thinking to themselves, "You know what would make this better? If I had to wear ugly, ill-fitting glasses so that once every 20 minutes something can kinda/sorta look like it is coming at me, even though I know it isn't." I don't even know where they added 3D in this new version of "Jurassic Park" but I am pretty confident that it will add nothing to the viewing experience. Of course, this has been Steven Spielberg's move for the last couple of years. He and George Lucas can't seem to leave well enough alone with their great films - they always have to go back and tinker. First it was adding in better graphics to the original "Star Wars" trilogy and then they went back and famously messed with "E.T." by changing all the FBI agents guns to walkie-talkies. Neither of these ideas were met with praise from critics or fans and yet here they are, doing it again. Someone needs to tell them they have to learn to simply let things go once they have been released because technology is just going to keep advancing, they will always be tinkering and these movie will never be finished. (Yes, I appreciate the irony of me being the one saying this.)

Look, I get that playing with the latest technology is fun. Also, I assume there was some studio executive who doubted the movie would do well if they didn't offer some new element. But, if anyone should have fought to leave the move untouched it should have been its creator. Oddly enough, what these guys don't seem to get about the movie re-watchers is that half the reason we like movies we have seen before is because nothing about them has changed. It is fun to be able to know the shocking line which is coming up because then we can watch the face of the people who haven't seen the movie before and how it hits them. Changing the movie in any way is just going to ruin the experience for us, but especially when you do something as universally scorned as 3D. And due to Spielberg's tinkering nature I can only assume we are five years away from the movie getting a third run in theaters for its 25th Anniversary, only this time the animatronic dinosaurs will be replaced with motion-captured CGI models because those will be the latest thing, finally ruining the movie for the people who loved it so much the first time around. If they just left it alone it would do just fine, but apparently they can't help themselves. And people wonder why so many movie studios are now the ones in danger of going extinct.