I Got Sole

I hate it when companies try and sell me stuff that I don't need under the guise that it is somehow crucial to my success. I'm sure you know what I mean - companies include unnecessary extras and then charge you more money for them while acting like they are the ones doing you a favor. Don't get me wrong, I know that this is the basis of all advertising and I get why they would try to trick me like that, but at some point it crosses the line into insulting my intelligence. For example, I think we both know that getting the undercoating on a new car is a waste of money so there is no need to pretend like including it in the purchase price means I should pay extra for the satellite radio. But no where is this concept more exploited than in the world of athletic sneakers. If you go back and read the biography of any great athlete from the last 40 years, 90 percent of them will include a passage about how the kid was so poor their family couldn't afford proper equipment, but the kid was so determined to be great they willed themselves to new heights, all while learning to play with magazines taped to their feet because they couldn't afford fancy sneakers. Hollywood loves that story, which is what makes it extra confusing when you contrast that with today's shoe market when kids not only think they can't win if they don't have the right sneaker, they need shoes which are incredibly expensive even they are only allowed to wear when they are playing in a game.

Not to go all get-off-my-lawn on you, but back when I was growing up you had two kinds of sneakers - high tops and low tops. Not really understanding what the difference was in terms of performance, you picked entirely on personal style and wore them until they fell apart, which included during whatever sport you were playing that afternoon. I never once remember buying a pair of sneakers based on how they would allegedly improve my skills in my entire life. Once you got to high school you may have needed to step up your game for field sports but even then all you had to do was find a generic pair of cleats to get the job done. (I distinctly remember showing up to my very first football practice in baseball cleats because at that point I didn't know there was a difference... and still doubt there is much of one.) We should all look at sneakers the same way we look at using a hammer to put a screw in when we can't find a screwdriver - yes, it probably would be better for everyone involved if I took the time and got the right tool for the job but at the end of the day as long as it gets the job done who cares if that is what it was intended for? Are the sneakers going to stop me from sliding all around a court during a game and then protect my feet from a rock on the walk home? If the answer is yes that is good enough for me.

But rather than rebel against this idea and demand shoes be more multi-purpose shoes are actually getting more specific. I keep seeing commercials for cross-fit shoes. It is my understanding that the entire point of cross-fit is working out with whatever you have handy (chains, tires and blocks) without using all sorts of expensive gym equipment. So, the idea you need $85 cross-fit specific shoes feels like it goes against that principle. The most annoying thing is that it is working. Every time the latest style of Jordans comes out, you can expect a news story about either a shooting or a riot at a store while the people are waiting in line for them and discovered there was a limited number of pairs at each store. Seriously, it is like a smaller version of Black Friday taking place just outside FootLocker. While I think we all know how annoying waiting in line can be, I can honestly say I have never been aggravated enough with the people standing next to me to want to fight them. Also, like the people who sleep outside for the right to buy the new iPhone even though I recently learned you don't have to, I just assume you can get the Jordans online and have them shipped to your house if you can stand to wait an extra day. And, seeing as how I am far from a sneaker maven, I am pretty sure I can stand to wait a couple extra hours.

That is not to say I think I am somehow above this. I am 95% sure that, just like a few weeks ago when I tried out new drivers and there was no difference in my swing even with different kinds of shafts, there will be no major improvement in my golf game if I invest in a new pair of golf spikes. I've played this long in sneakers and my swing hasn't gotten worse, so what are the honest odds of my game improving because of the shoes on my feet? I'm confident Tiger Woods would play the same in loafers, yet I continue to look for a good pair of golf shoes and not only will I probably buy them if the price is right, I will then totally talk up why I needed them if questioned about it. Also, I understand there are moments when a different kind of shoe may actually be necessary. For example, I know that in wrestling you don't want a shoe with too much grip on the bottom because there are times when you would rather slide than get a foot caught in the mat and have it roll up underneath. I am just saying that the number of times when this is the case if far lower than shoe companies would have you believe. And in this day when sneakers aren't getting any cheaper I just feel like the least they could do is give us more bang for out buck because at some point even the best pair of shoes are only going to be needed to walk from one side of the room to the other.