Visitors Shouldn't Make The Rules

One of the things that always made me hesitant to undertake world travel is the fact that I am a very uncomfortable guest. I like to sleep in my own bed, have my food how I like it and my TV to have ESPN. Also, I really don't like people waiting on me. The last thing I would ever want to do is go into someone else's home and then expect them to alter their plans just because I decided that now would be a good time to stop in. This belief system is what makes me a much better host than guest. I try to go about my visits by causing as little disruption as possible. Even when I'm staying in hotels I practically want to leave the maid a note saying that she doesn't have to make the bed while I'm there and she can just wait until I've checked out. I admit that I am fairly set in my ways and I don't really see the need to change how I do things. However, at least I realise this about myself and therefore do not have the audacity to go to other countries and demand that they adapt to me instead of the other way around (you know, the stereotypical Ugly American). This is also why I typically like to do my travelling within the US, because you get to explore new cities and see new places, but you don't have to learn a new language or get screwed by the exchange rate.

It's because of the way that I am as a guest that I was very relieved to see the USA beat Algeria today and advance to the next round in the World Cup. I had a fear that, if the US was robbed of a second victory because of an iffy call, that the talking heads on TV would go on the rampage demanding that FIFA adopts instant replay and that this wrong be righted immediately. While that would be fine in a sport we invented like baseball or the NFL, soccer isn't our sport (as evidenced by the fact that we call it soccer). I understand that the way TV analysts make their money is by trying to out-crazy one another in louder and louder voices, but when you're being beamed across the world it just sends a bad message that might be how a lot of people feel when that actually isn't the case. Because here's the thing we as a country have to admit at the end of the day: whether we win or lose the World Cup is actually of very little consequence to a lot of Americans. If we win, great. If we don't, whatever, NFL training camp is like a month away. We care about this sport about three times in four years: during the Olympics, at the World Cup and any crucial qualifiers to make sure we get into the World Cup. Anything beyond that and the soccer stories are buried on page 5. When we so infrequently look up from our other sports to care about soccer it just doesn't seem like a good idea to start demanding that the rest of the world changes the rules they have been playing under for decades just because a couple calls went against us. We'd be better off learning to adapt to the way that the rest of the world plays... except for the facts that group ties can be decided by a random drawing and shootouts can win the whole tournament. That shit is whacked.

-Not that I was thinking of entering into a criminal enterprise anytime soon but, just in case I was, the universe sent me a reminder today that I am not the kind of person who gets away with things. My truck failed its yearly inspection... again. For the third time since I bought it, the emergency brake did not hold to the necessary RPMs that the State of Massachusetts feels it must. Whatever, I can get it adjusted or tightened or whatever it has to be. At this point I fully expect to fail my yearly inspections going into the bays. Still, it annoys me because there are people out there who know people and therefore can pull into inspection stations with no registrations (and occasionally no bumpers) and still drive out of there with a pass. Clearly, I am not one of those people. Just a cosmic reminder that if I ever even tried to pull off a criminal heist, I would wind up in jail before I even got started by being pulled over for a seat belt violation.