Weekly Sporties

-So, let's get your NBA lockout update out of the way early this week: everyone involved is stupid. I continue to hope and believe that there will be a season and that they'll probably still have a majority of the games. But even though we have been told for the last couple of days that a deal could be struck at any moment because the sides were so close, the players have decided to take the weekend away from the negotiating table and present the current deal to the players as is, even though they think it is unacceptable and should be rejected. This delay means a deal isn't going to be agreed to for at least another couple of weeks, which means the season won't start until after the new year. All this despite everyone knowing that when a deal is signed in a couple weeks it will look pretty much like what is on the table now. You may be wondering exactly what the hold up is and why, if the deal isn't going to change much between now and then, they don't just sign the thing now and get it over with? Well, again, it's because everyone involved is stupid and they deserve each other.

-It's been a couple of days and the fervor from the Penn State sex scandal appears to be calming down somewhat. When I first heard that Joe Paterno had been fired I thought it was a bad decision on the part of Penn State. I thought suspending him for the rest of the year would have been enough. But, then it was pointed out to me that all that would do is delay the inevitable and the scandal would be born again next fall. The only way to truly move passed this dark time in the school's history would be to clear out everyone involved and try to begin a new era. So, I came around on firing Joe-Pa. That being said, I thought the way the school fired Paterno was disgraceful. They sent him a letter telling him to call a number and then fired him over the phone. After all the money Paterno has given back to the school I feel like they at least owed it to him to fire him to his face. Send a car, he lives a mile from campus. You let the guy accused of child molestation roam the campus for 12 years, the least you could do is let the guy who made your university what it is today come back and face his firing squad. Instead the board of trustees hid like cowards. More and more I'm coming to grips with the fact that there are no winners in this story, as everyone looks bad. Moving on.

-So, after a very uneventful few games with the New England Patriots, defensive tackle Albert Haynesworth was released this week. When he was acquired I had wondered just how Haynesworth was going to fit in here, considering the Patriots play a 3-4 defense and Albert hates that defensive scheme. Turns out I had reason to worry, as Haynesworth barely made it onto the field and didn't appear very interested in the proceedings when he was out there. The good news is that this little experiment didn't cost the Patriots much. Also, Haynesworth was not involved in any off-the-field incidents during his time here, which was a concern after his behavior in both Tennessee and Washington. But, if you have ever wondered if you have made a bad trade, ask yourself the following question: are the two best things people can say about it was that it was cheap and at least the player involved never got arrested? If the answer is yes, then you have made a very bad trade.

-Speaking of bad trades, former Red Sox GM Dan Duquette was hired this week to be the new General Manager of the Baltimore Orioles. I was kind of surprised to read that news, because I thought Duquette's window to get back into baseball had closed. After you've been out of the game for a while teams just stop calling. But given his track record, I had wondered why he had such trouble finding a new job in baseball after his time in Boston. I know he was not the most personable of executives, but I always thought Dan had some good ideas and felt he got unfairly criticized for a lot of moves around the Red Sox. After all, he was the one who brought in both Manny Ramirez and Pedro Martinez and the Sox would never have won a World Series without them. And anyone who released Roger Clemens couldn't be all bad. I don't think he'll be able to turn the Orioles around, but that will have more to do with ownership than anything he does. I'm just glad that he managed to get back into baseball, because after you've been out of it for a few years people stop wondering where you've been.

-Another name that was popular in the early 2000s, but hasn't done much since then is that of John Daly. Daly was playing in a tournament in Australia the other day when he was assessed a two-stroke penalty. Unhappy with the ruling, Daly went to the next hole and proceeded to intentionally plunk 7 straight shots into the water (even I stop after 3). With no more balls in his bag, Daly was disqualified and walked off the course. The tournament executives were furious and the Australian Tour said Daly would not be allowed to participate in the other tournament in Australia that he was scheduled to play in a couple weeks. Now, I'm not even going to bother wondering why Daly (currently ranked 666th in the world) is even still getting sponsor's exemptions into tournaments, because it is a waste of time. Instead, I'm curious to find an answer to the following: why did he only have 7 golf balls in his bag? He's a pro, it's not like he has to buy them. Even I keep a few sleeves in my bag and I'm the one who has to carry it. I've seen the bags the pros use, it's not like he was going to run out of pockets or room. Given the way he's been hitting them lately, you would have thought he would have known better and had at least 10 golf balls at the ready. Then again, you can't exactly expect John Daly to make rational decisions.

-There was another bit of controversy at that same golf tournament, this one involving Tiger Woods' former caddy, Steve Williams. Last weekend Williams was accepting a tongue-in-cheek award from a caddy organization for the most over-the-top celebration following Adam Scott's win the week Woods fired Williams, which Williams said was the most satisfying victory of his career. During his acceptance speech, Williams referred to Woods using a racial slur. Woods, to his credit, came out and said Williams is not a racist and while the comment was unfortunate, he wasn't looking to make a big deal of it. You know, for a couple weeks after the firing, everyone thought Woods was the villain of this story and Williams the victim. But, now we see that our first impression of Steve Williams (bully, heavy-handed and all-around jerk of a guy) was probably the one we should have stuck with, while Woods is seen as the guy taking the high road. It just goes to show you: if you wait long enough the roles of any scandal will get reversed.

-A few days ago American surfer Garrett McNamara rode a 90-foot wave off the coast of Portugal, breaking the world record for the largest wave ever surfed. Now, that sounds very impressive and if you look at the pictures it is very stunning to see. But, I still feel like we're burying the lead here: there are 90-foot waves off the coast of Portugal. Apparently, there is an undersea chasm the size of the grand canyon which creates these big waves on a regular basis. Now, I've watch that documentary on rogue waves a few times now and know that a 90-foot wave is more than enough to take down a cruise ship. And these are rogue waves, which mean they can turn any direction they want at a moment's notice. You couldn't pay me enough to live on that beach. I don't care if scientists think they know the reason for the waves, I'll stick to Cape Cod and its 5-footers, thank you very much.