A Tale Of Two Previews

I'm a firm believer that the previews on a DVD are a good indicator towards the quality level of the movie you are about to see. If you think about it, the theory makes a lot of sense: if you're watching a mindless action flick, then you probably aren't interested in last year's Oscar winner, so let's look at previews for even more mindless action movies. And if those previews are for big-budget movies, then you can assume you are about to watch one of those. If they are for straight-to-DVD low-budget films it may be time to bail. It is only when you have already seen all the movies in the previews and you know they all stink that you truly begin to realise you may be in trouble. However, Saturday night I settled in to watch the classic cinematic adventure, "The A-Team", when something which I've never seen before happened: the final preview on the DVD was for the movie I was about to watch.

At first I thought it was just a few sequences from the movie put together to show before the main menu kicked in, because that is kind of common with DVDs these days. However, after a minute I realised that not only was it not the start of the menu, but it wasn't just a quick preview, either - it was the full, theatrical trailer. You know, one of those long trailers which is more like a highlight sequence for the entire movie. It didn't make any sense to me because it seems to be the equivalent of putting the Cliff's Notes in the first few pages of a new book. Why are you showing me the thing I'm about to watch? Stop trying to sell your movie to me - you've won, I rented it. It feels like over-kill. No one comes to your home to tell you how great IKEA furniture is after you've already put it together, because that is both unnecessary and weird. The same rules apply here.

[Sidebar: Since we're here, I feel I should give a quick movie review. I actually liked "The A-Team." I mean, you get exactly what you expect, so if you know that going in you can shut your mind off and enjoy the experience. Other than the character names it didn't have much to do with the TV show because it was more like a prequel, but considering I don't hold the original show up as though it was a seminal TV moment that didn't bother me as much as it did other people. It was light on plot, big on explosions as well as one-liners and Jessica Biel is ridiculously hot. What's not to like?]

I mean, I can see that there are some positives to showing a preview immediately before airing the movie. After all, how many times have you seen movie trailer and thought, "Man, I can't wait until I can see that!" Well, in this case the wait was about 5 seconds. In this age of instant gratification, it was kind of rewarding. Plus, it definitely beats the alternative. When I went to see "Captain America" last week one of the previews was for the newest Spiderman re-boot. They showed several clips from the movie, then ended with a graphic informing us that the movie was coming out in July of 2012. Are you kidding me? Was the preview comprised of the only scenes they have finished so far? Why are you showing me a movie that isn't coming out for over a year? Just to put that into context, I could impregnate a girl tomorrow and then still have enough time to bring that kid to the movie's opening night. (Don't worry, mom and dad, I won't. I'll be the guy who the guy that does that sits behind.)

In the end, I'm just looking for a little more balance. Since I never plan my life that far out ahead, I don't need to know about your movie until a couple of weeks before it is in theatres. And by the time it is available to be rented, I will have gathered enough information to make an informed decision, so I don't need to see a preview right before I watch it. But, here's the most important lesson I learned - don't ever include a trailer for "Wall Street 2" on your DVD, because that was almost enough to make me give up on the movie before it even started.