Sean Avery's Reality Check

It's about time that a major sports star (ok, he might just be an NHL star, but as far as NHL stars go, he's up there) actually got punished for doing something wrong.

You see, I love sports. But, in the words of Chris Rock "I'm just tired of defending it." Whenever a sports star screws up someone (usually the one person on ESPN who you can tell really wants to be doing 'real' news) points out how if you or I did that same thing at our job, we would get fired. And most of the time, I don't have much of a comeback. Well, thank you Sean Avery for solving my problem.

Avery, who's a pretty descent forward for the Dallas Stars, is also a douchebag. It's never been a secret that he's a large ass, as evidence by the fact that despite his talent he has bounced between four teams over the last nine years. Also, he's really into fashion, even interning at Vogue during his offseason. That doesn't make him more of a douche, it just makes him weird.

Back in the day when he was playing for the Los Angeles Kings, Avery dated actress Elisha Cuthbert of The Girl Next Door fame (yes, I know she was on 24, but I've never seen that). Apparently she came around to his doucey-ness and moved on with another hockey player who played for the Calgary Flames. When Avery's Stars came to Calgary the other day, Sean gathered reporters around him, waited until they were all rolling and said the following gem:

"I'm just going to say one thing. I'm really happy to be back in Calgary, I love Canada. I just wanted to comment on how, it's become like a common thing in the NHL for guys to fall in love with my sloppy seconds. I don't know what that's about, but enjoy the game tonight."

Classy, no? He then walked away without taking any questions, probably really proud of himself. You could tell by looking at him that he thought this was hysterical. After all, he had just made fun of his ex-girlfriend and her new boyfriend in one fell swoop and he had done it on TV. Doucheness achieved.

One small problem for Sean Avery: the league has enough problems pulling in an audience without pissing off women. So, the commissioner called him into his office and told him to sit out the next six games. Then this morning, the Dallas Stars told him that that's ok, why don't you just not come back ever. That would be karma, dude.