No Soliciting

When I was still working in radio, I would often get asked if I wanted to transition over to sales. I never seriously thought about it, partially because when you are part of the programming staff you come to see the salespeople are being in your way, as they always want you to do something special for their client. After years of having that "us vs them" mantra drilled into my brain, changing sides felt akin to treason. But, the main reason I never made the switch is that I know I would be a terrible salesman. Quality salesmen have a gene in them which recognizes when a client may be wavering and knows they should go in for the kill to try and finish the deal. That gene is totally it is missing from my DNA coding. Instead I possess the "Yeah, it's a big decision, take your time and get back to me" gene. That gentler approach may be more appreciated in some circles, but it won't help you reach your quota for that month. Still, I think that is why I appreciate the less-aggressive salesmen I encounter. I hate being upsold on a product I wasn't sure I wanted in the first place. But, the thing I hate even more is when people get up in my face even though I didn't show any interest in their product. So, as you can imagine, unsolicited calls to my house drive me especially crazy.

My home number is on the National Do-Not-Call List, and being on that list does exactly as much good you would expect from any service run by the US government. The list has all sorts of loopholes for companies to sneak through and so my phone rings all time the time with offers of services I did not ask anyone to call me about. The hot one lately has been the one offering me a free home alarm system in exchange for putting a sign on the front lawn. Since I know there is no such thing as free I ignore the offer. Normally that would be the end of it, except I'm the kind of patient person who is willing to wait through the pre-recorded message because I know some of them provide you with the chance to opt-out should you make it all the way to the end without hanging up. Here's the part which really pisses me off: I'll sit through the whole thing, hit the 9 button to opt-out of future calls... only to have them call me again later. Honestly, if these companies aren't going to follow through on taking me off the list than why do they even have it? Don't tease me with the thought that I may never have to hear from you ever again if your system doesn't actually know how to do that part.

I get the same problem with my email. Due to a variety of reasons, I have five email addresses. I work really hard to keep one of them as spam-free as I can. If I have even the slightest hint a website might be shady I direct them to send all future emails to another address which is set up specifically so I can ignore it for long chunks of time and allow the spam to pile up. So, you can imagine my frustration when the one email address I'm trying to keep clean ends up with the most junk email of all of them. I think part of the problem is that it is a slightly common nickname for an email address which a lot of people use, only the numbers at the end vary. On more than one occasion I believe I have gotten email from a legitimate company and the person just entered in the wrong address. (For example, I'm currently getting someone's Match.com mailings and have no idea how to fix it. I don't know who this guy is but, no worries, because I've looked at his matches and he isn't missing much.) I will constantly block senders and opt-out of any list which gives me the chance, but it doesn't help. Half the time I'm pretty sure all I'm doing is convincing them to send me more mail, because at least they are getting a click-through, even if it is out of anger.

Ironically, the only place where my efforts to cut down on the amount of junk mail I get appears to be working is in my actual mailbox. I get a lot less physical junk mail delivered to the house than through any other source, but I have a sinking suspicion that has less to do with my efforts to stay vigilant and more to do with the fact that companies think it is more effective to send emails. [Sidebar: I'm not even sure that is true. At least with junk mail in my mailbox I will look at it for as long as it takes to walk up the driveway and throw it into the recycling bin. If it is a menu for a new restaurant I may even hang on to it. But junk email I delete without a second thought and never glance at anything passed the title of the email. It may be cheaper, but I don't think it is as productive.] The worst part is that the unsolicited calls and emails are only going to come more frequently, because this is an election year (hand to God, as I was typing this post I got a call from a political group) and (shocker) political organizations are exempt from the Do-Not-Call list. I don't know if these will help one party win an election, but I'm pretty sure if these guys worked in radio sales that industry would be doing a lot better.