Airing of Grievances

No one really wants to hear other people complain about the holidays. There is a strange arrogance to the act, as if the person doing the complaining is the only one who has to deal with stressful situations while everyone else is floating through without any problems. With that in mind I made a conscious effort to be a little more positive on the blog for the last couple of weeks. However, Christmas is now over. Therefore with that self-imposed gag order removed, I feel comfortable going back and going over a few things which irked me during the holiday season. Here they are in no particular order...

-Mall VJs. The new thing in malls is to have TVs set up in the food courts which play music videos. Now, I was already feeling old because not only did I not know who sang half the songs I heard, I also didn't come close to getting the music trivia right, which is something I used to pride myself on. With that in mind I did not need the extra confusion of seeing these VJs saying things like, "Hey, it's Tamara" like were are on a first-name basis. Luckily, it turns out this is not an issue of age, as most people seemed confused as to who this person was. You are not famous enough to go by only your first name. Hell, you're not famous enough to act like I am supposed to know who you are, period. This is not MTV during its heyday when the VJs doubled as celebrities - you're pretty much only there to provide background noise so if you want to use this job as a stepping stone you would be well-served to stop acting like you are famous. But, the topic of music brings me to my next subject.

-Radio stations. If you look at the ratings books for this month, the stations which switch to Christmas-only music typically come in towards the top of the charts. So, I have no problem with them switching earlier and earlier. However, if you are only going to play one genre of music for two months, you could at least do some digging to have a greater variety. Sometimes I seriously wonder if these program directors think there are only 10 Christmas songs they can work with. I know many listeners would prefer it if these stations stuck with the classics because most new Christmas music is awful, but after a couple weeks the repetition is maddening. Even if people don't want to hear all new music you could always use other Christmas songs from popular artists. For example, Springsteen does a fine version of "Merry Christmas Baby" which never get played. Meanwhile, the only thing I am more grateful for than anyone who took the time to get me a present is that there are 300 days before I have to hear the Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band sing "Santa Claus Is Comin' to Town" again. I don't know how the DJs don't go insane.

-Lazy Parents. Some days I think I would like to eventually have kids of my own... but then I go shopping at Christmas time and that feeling goes away. I've been around enough kids to understand that after a while their own child's whining becomes like white-noise and parents barely hear it. Also, parents can't respond to every request their kids have or they will never get anything done. That is fine for you. But for the rest of us your kid's voice is like nails on a chalkboard. The thing is I don't blame the kid, I blame the parents who decide not to hear it, because ignoring it is pissing the rest of us off way more than the child's whining ever could. Honestly, what did you think was going to happen when you brought a small child to the toy department a week before Christmas? I know babysitters are expensive and the extra cost at Christmas time is just not feasible, but how about you put in a little effort over here and then go back to being lazy when you are in housewares? The kid is going to whine a lot less staring at blenders and that is really all the rest of us want.

-Price Tags. I'll start this part off with a confession: I lied about how much your gift cost. Doesn't even matter who I'm talking to, I'll usually under-value the item I got someone because I am surrounded by individuals who want me to spend $1 on them every year and get mad when I go over that budget. So, I'll take a few bucks off the final price so they don't worry about how much I've spent. The thing is, this deception would be easier to achieve if price tags would come off. Half of the price tags I tried to remove this Christmas were on the package with way more glue than was necessary. Even worse are the tags which are perforated and come off in sections. I would understand that if it was the section with the price on it, but most of them split the tag down the middle for no reason whatsoever. I keep my nails pretty short and so getting an edge to start pulling the tags off is annoying enough without getting a quarter of the tag off before it rips and I have to start the process all over again. Considering most items scan in without the tags anyway why are we so determined to keep them attached?

-Register Clerks. I don't need them to comment on the things I have purchased. They are the ones who work there and see this stuff every day, so shouldn't I be the one who is surprised by what deal I found? Even if they are saying something nice it still feels like forced conversation. One woman made the extra point to loudly announce to no one in particular that the item I was buying was expensive. Thanks, because I love attention so much and what I really wanted was for everyone around me to look in my direction. Also, stop staring at my debit card while you are waiting for the transaction to process because it makes me paranoid that you are either trying to memorize the numbers or the card has been rejected for some reason, even though I know there is no reason for me to worry. I know they are probably bored and just looking for a way to break the awkward silence but considering this 30 second interaction was never going to lead to a life-long friendship, I am officially relieving them of that feeling of obligation. In the future just say hello, tell me a total, hand me a bag and wish me a good day.