Weekly Sporties

-Just last week I was talking about how amusing I found it that MLB was trying to act like the district attorney's office by threatening players with lengthy suspensions and then tempting them with shorter ones in exchange for providing information about the other players who visited reported steroid dealer Anthony Bosch. Since MLB doesn't really have the power to suspend them in the first place without any real proof it felt like Commissioner Bud Selig was watching too much "Law & Order". The only way this could possibly work is if there one was stupid, selfish player who screwed the deal up for the rest of the players accused. Enter Alex Rodriguez. According to various sources Alex is afraid MLB could hit him with an indefinite suspension which would cost him the remainder of his contract (worth over $100 million). Thus, A-Rod is reportedly ready to cut a deal with MLB to only be suspended for 50 games. While that would cost him a healthy chunk of his contract he would still get most of his money, provided the Yankees don't find a way to use his suspension to wriggle out of the remainder of the deal (which is very possible). Obviously, I am not rooting for any players who took steroids, but let me just say that of course A-Rod is going to be the one to screw this up. Someone needs to remind him that he has never actually failed a drug test and the only evidence MLB has against him is his name on a list and the word of a drug dealer. The only way they can prove anything is if they get a confession, so why would you ever think of providing them with one? For as long as Alex Rodriguez has been in the majors people have thought he was a phony who was too desperate to make everyone like him. Well, this is when someone close to Alex should pull him aside and remind him that baseball is only using him because no matter how much he tells them they will never be able to get him into the Hall of Fame or change the opinions of the people who view him as a cheater. With that in mind he may as well make sure he at least gets all the money he is supposed to have coming to him, because as long as Alex wants to keep up the illusion that everyone likes him he'd better keep the money rolling. People have a hard time tell you what they think of you as long as you keep picking up the check.

-Since losing Dwight Howard to Houston, the Lakers have made a few minor moves to patch up their roster, but they haven't been the aggressive transactions many people expected and this week we learned why: the Lakers's plan is to clear the deck and have no one under contract beyond next season so they can make a run at either LeBron James, Carmelo Anthony or both. This is a pretty common plan as next year is expected to have one of the biggest free agent crops since LeBron originally went to Miami but the difference here is that these are the Lakers. History has shown that while teams like Boston (hey, the truth hurts) and Detroit can have all the cap space in the world they still can't attract free agents unless they wildly over-pay for them, but when the Lakers have the money to spend they immediately become most free agents' preferred destination. Los Angeles offers the perfect combination of a glamour franchise, off-court endorsement opportunities and celebrity fans that NBA players seem to love - it's been this way since the Lakers moved from Minnesota. Still, I wouldn't start printing up those gold LeBron jerseys just yet. First off, reports are that while LeBron has certainly enjoyed his on-court time in Miami he is not a big fan of the club scene, so the Los Angeles limelight will not be a huge draw. But more importantly there is no way James will want to go back to what he had in Cleveland which was one great player surrounded by a bunch of role players so if the Lakers realistically want LeBron they need to make sure they have a plan to bring in several good players to build around him (ironically, like the Cavaliers have done). If they think they can simply go to LeBron and say, "But we're the Lakers!" they are in for a rude awakening (just ask the Knicks back in 2010 because this was their pitch to James and they ended up with Amar'e Stoudemire.) So, the real question facing the Lakers is whether or not Jimmy Buss knows what he is doing because as Dwight Howard has shown, players may like to play in Los Angeles but they automatically won't pick it over a team which has a better situation. Remember, those celebrity fans aren't going to come out and watch a loser.

-In a move which was totally expected, late this week the NHL announced it is going to allow its players to compete in the 2014 Olympics. I like how they are saying that like it was their choice. Honestly, did you think there was any way a guy like Alex Ovechkin was going to skip playing for Russia when the Olympics are being held in his home country? Last week I was telling you about Ilya Kovalchuk retiring from the NHL to play in his native Russia, walking away from $77 million in the name of being closer to home (as an aside, Kovalchuk signed his new contract this week and it turns out he is actually getting a raise, so never mind that aspect). But, the larger point was that the NHL is not the be-all and end-all for most hockey players, so of course almost all of them would want to play in international competition. On top of that you can't really blame anyone who wants to compete for their country - you can't put a price on National pride. Still, I can appreciate why the NHL would be against this because unlike the NBA the Winter Olympics take place during their regular season, so they have to shut the league down for two weeks after the NFL season has ended (pretty much the first time most of us remember hockey's season has started) to accommodate all the missing players. Taking two weeks off in the middle of your season to send your best players to a competition in which they can get seriously injured and miss significant time is probably not the most ideal situation, especially when you are one year removed from a lockout and desperate to get casual fans back to the sport but if the alternative is that all these wildly talented players don't come to your league in the first place than you are just going to have to deal with it. Instead what the NHL should do is embrace the Olympic style (which is often more open than the NHL's thanks to bigger rinks) and use it to showcase their talent. I mean, if Sydney Crosby scored another gold-medal-winning goal would that be a bad thing for the NHL? Of course it wouldn't. The bottom line is that this is happening whether the NHL wants it to or not, so they had been just embrace the opportunity because fighting it will only alienate their players and the NHL is not their only option.

-I can't remember anyone in recent memory who has enjoyed being "The Man" in college football as much as Texas A&M quarterback Johnny Manziel. Of course, it is entirely possible someone has but they just benefited from doing it before cellphone cameras. Since becoming the first freshman to win the Heisman trophy, Manziel has photographed popping bottles in the club, throwing out the first pitch at a Padres game and sitting courtside at several NBA games. Some have questioned exactly how focused he was on school (Manziel is only taking online classes at A&M to "avoid being a distraction to the rest of his classmates") and preparing for another tough season in the SEC. While I may have my doubts about just how good Manziel really is I actually didn't have any problems with his antics because I figured he was a 20 year-old kid and he was just doing what anyone would do in his situation, so the media should back off and remember how they acted in college. But then came reports last weekend that Manziel left the prestigious Manning passing camp where he was a counselor early because he was hung-over. Despite lots of online accounts that Manziel was working his way up and down a strip of bars, Johnny contends he was not hung-over the next day but did admit to over-sleeping and missing a meeting, which is why he and the Mannings decided he should leave (despite the phrasing I am willing to bet that was not a mutual decision). I have to say that for the first time I have to side with the people who think Manziel needs to start reigning himself in because football season is fast approaching. When Rob Gronkowski was photographed without a shirt every other day during the Patriots offseason I said I didn't care as long as he was ready to go when the season started. Well, the same goes for Manziel. I understand that a passing camp for high schoolers run by Archie Manning and his kids is not exactly Aggie training camp, but it doesn't change the fact it was a football-related activity and Johnny didn't answer the bell. And if he thinks the scrutiny about his off-field activities is intense now, just wait until the first time he doesn't play well. He'll think facing the Alabama defense is easy compared to that.

-A few years ago former UCLA basketball player Ed O'Bannon sued the NCAA regarding its deal with video game maker EA Sports. If you have never played a college video game before, none of the players in those games have names attached to them but their vital statistics are always very close to the actual players playing in college. Frankly, you'd have to be an idiot to not see that EA was doing their best to make the rosters as close to authentic as possible without using the players by name because if they did that they would have to pay them and that would violate the amateur rules. Instead EA made a deal directly with the NCAA, who happily sold out their student-athletes and kept all the money for themselves. As you would expect, the athletes were not happy about this but only O'Bannon took the initiative to hire a lawyer and file a lawsuit. This week he was joined by several active football players, the first time current players have spoken up regarding the issue. In response, the NCAA announced it is ending it's deal with EA Sports. Now, I'm not saying this makes the NCAA look guilty, but it certainly is not the action of an innocent organization. Honestly, for an organization which claims to want to teach children how to act like adults, this was as child-like an act as I can imagine. Frankly, I am glad this happened. I have never hid my feelings regarding the NCAA, which I think exploits college athletes under the guise of maintaining an idea of amateurism which was never there while negotiating television deals worth hundreds of millions of dollars and keeping all the money for themselves. I hope these players bleed the NCAA for every dollar they can. However, if you are looking to get sports fans on your side messing with their video games is not the way to go about it. Individual schools, bowls and conference also have deals with EA Sports, so hopefully this won't impact NCAA Football '15, but if it does there will be an army of annoyed 18-34 year old males who will be happy to pay for the NCAA's legal fees. I'm with you in spirit boys, but video games are the only way I can quarterback the Irish to a National Championship. You just can't put a price on that.

-I admit, I laugh almost every time a call is made during a basketball game which is so bad it ignites the crowd into a loud and prolonged chant of "Bullll-shit!" I don't know why but there is something amusing to me about public and shared vulgarity. And fans of the New York Red Bull team in the MLS apparently agree with me because every single time an opponent takes a ball out for a corner kick they begin to chant, "You suck, asshole" to try and distract them. Now, if this were just a few drunken fans it wouldn't be an issue but, just like in the Premier League, the teams in the MLS have dedicated rooting clubs who all come to the game together, fill an entire section and chant in unison. Thus, when the Red Bull fans are chanting they are loud and proud. The New York fans are not the only team which do this but the are one of the most organized and it is becoming an issue because the chants are loud enough to be heard clearly on TV. Thus, this has exposed the league's broadcast partners to fines from the FCC and the timing couldn't be worse because the MLS TV deals are about to expired and they are negotiating new ones. For a league which has had a hard time building a fanbase you would think they would simply appreciate having people in the stands no matter what they are chanting but I think by now we all recognize that TV is where the real money is made. So, the MLS is desperate for teams to figure out a way for teams to stop this. While franchises like New England and Real Salt Lake have tried asking nicely and the Red Bulls are relying on an old favorite to try and get their fans to be quiet - bribery. They have pledge $500 to each rooting club for every game they make it through without the YSA (as they call it) chant. But, here's the rub - they will only pay out the reward money in $2,000 clumps, which means the clubs have to make it through four games without chanting if they want to get paid. No word on how this is working yet, but if I know my hooligans I don't think it will work because they will get about three games before they forget and once the silence is broken they will simply make up for lost time. If they want to appease a TV network the MLS may have better luck just offering to pay the FCC fines themselves because that appears much more likely than getting a group of New Yorkers to stop swearing.

-Since we're on the subject of bribery, at this point I don't think anyone can be surprised when they hear there could be a judging scandal associated with the Olympics. Just like with the NCAA, even though the International Olympic Committee claims it strives to preserve amateur athletics, everything has a price attached to it. However, even I was surprised to read that there is a major scandal rocking the world of rhythmic gymnastics. A recent investigation uncovered major discrepancies in the testing procedures used by the IOC to find judges for the sport. Apparently tests taken by potential judges in Spain, Russia and Romania featured answered that were changed by proctors, had answered which appeared to be blatantly copied off one another and were given extra credit for things which did not exist. One test allegedly had multiple handwriting samples on it while the 'smart' cheaters just went old-school by writing answers on their hands. If you are wondering why people would go through all this trouble just to judge rhythmic gymnastics (because I know I was), there are two reasons - the first is the very obvious answer that it pays very well without being very hard. You have to know what you are looking at but it beats digging ditches. But the second is that it puts these people in the position of being able to influence the outcome for an Olympic event and even in a sport most people don't actually think should count in a sport that means you are in a position of power. After an Olympic game concludes all people want to look at is the overall medal count - they don't care what sports your country got their wins in, so if they can pad that medal total by cheating that is what they will do. But while I understand that I would ask you this - does anyone remember the medal count by the next games? A common theme of this weekly column is how often people make asses out of themselves in an effort to win a prize most people think aren't even worth trying for and I feel like this is just another example of that. Then again, considering no one pays attention to most Olympic sports for 3 years at a time I guess trying to rig judging assignments just fits in with the Olympic tradition.