Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Thoughts From A Mall...

-As I have no offspring (that I know of, right fellas?), I'm not about to sit here and tell another person how they should raise their child. But, that doesn't mean I can't sit back and silently judge the job they are doing. For example, if you are the kind of parent who takes your kid up and down every single aisle of a toy department, letting them touch and play with every toy that is not in a box, you can not act shocked when the kid begins to flip out that they aren't getting anything to bring home. It would be like someone allowing you to test drive every sports car on the lot and then being forced to slink back to your Gremlin. Now, as an adult I would hope that people have learned not to tease themselves with such things, but apparently some parents expect this maturity to trickle down to their kids. If there is one thing I have learned in the last 5 years it would be to not expect maturity from children. If I know that and yet a parent doesn't then clearly they missed a class somewhere along the way.

-When you spend as much time around the members of my family as I do, you can begin to forget that we are an above-average group, height-wise. So, every now and again I appreciate the ego boost of being released out into the general public and not being the smallest guy in the room. I was standing in line and filling in the 50 feet in front of me was a group of various humans, none of whom came up to my chest. I could see clear to the checkout counter without so much as a hat in my way. It was kind of nice to feel tall until the next time I was in a room with my brother.

-I went into my shopping with a few very specific targets. The problem with this mindset is that you tend to buy the first item that meets the criteria of the thing you are looking for and that's not always the way to go. Yesterday I was looking for a very specific type of toy for one of my nieces and when I found what I was looking for I was very quick to snap it up. The problem was that I found a better one a couple of hours later. This has now made me gun shy. This morning I saw a great toy for my nephew but since it was the first store I went into I was convinced I would find something better in short order. Several stores and hours later I still hadn't topped that first idea. Never go against your instincts. [Sidebar: why the hell the one-year old is the hardest to buy for I will never know.]

-In the last couple of years the new trend in malls has been the pop-up stores that are only around for the holidays. I assume it is a win-win for everyone as the mall gets a couple months rent and the tenant can make a few extra bucks burning off some inventory. However, this year I have noticed that at some malls they have pop-up "stores" out in the middle of everything. It's not like the kiosks, either. These aren't much more than a couple folding tables up against the railings on the second floor. First off, that's valuable walking space and you're just causing congestion. (At least make a path so I can get my Auntie Annie's Pretzel.) I know that times are tough and you would rather have a storefront, but if that is your goal might I suggest a wider selection of merchandise than movie posters, wrestling masks and old concert tee-shirts. That's not a pop-up store: it's a yard sale.

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