Saturday, November 14, 2009

That Doesn't Make Sense

In my near-constant quest for editorial work, I end up reading a lot of job postings. Most of them feature some variation of the sentence, "We want some one who will dot every 'i' and cross every 't'." Now, because I want the job, I would never point it out to the people doing the posting, but this phrase makes no sense in today's landscape. Does anyone hand-write copy anymore? When was the last time you saw an important document that wasn't done on a computer? And, most importantly, is there a program that doesn't automatically dot the i? Of course there isn't. It's just another phrase that should be retired, or at least altered. I was thinking about it and came up with a couple others:

-The journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step. Actually, what you need to do first is get directions off of Google.

-If you can't stand the heat, stay out of the kitchen. Perhaps you should be calling someone to make sure the vents are working. Seems like a safety issue.

-You can't make an omelette without breaking a few eggs. It may taste nasty, but they do sell that pre-made omelette mix in stores.

-A penny saved is a penny earned. If you think about it, technically you earned it before you saved it. Plus, with today's interest rates if you leave it in a high-yield savings account it can be worth even more than a penny.

-You can fool people some of the time, but you can't fool them all of the time. Clearly Aesop never watched Chris Angel's Mind Freak. Those idiots really think he's magical.

No comments: